Andy Smith 00:00 
A quick disclaimer before we begin, this episode contains sensitive content, including discussions of suicide, injury detail, bereavement, and extreme loss. We understand these topics can be distressing and listener discretion is advised. The therapies discussed in this episode are for informational purposes only. And if you have any health concerns, please visit a healthcare professional. Welcome back to another episode of the PEMF podcast. Today's episode is one that will stay with you long after you've heard it. I guess Jade has been through more trauma than most can probably imagine. From losing children to being told she'd never walk again. Jade's journey is one of unimaginable loss, resilience, and healing. Through holistic therapies, including PMF, Reiki, she's defined all odds and found a way forward now. Jade, can you just introduce yourself and tell us what you're doing now?

Jade Horton 00:53 
Yeah, so I'm an angelic Reiki master now.

Andy Smith 00:56 
And before we come to the 10th of December, which is a big date in your life and all the kind of trauma that came after that and the resilience. Let's talk about before then, because there was more trauma in your life before that. So more through your parents and can you give us a little bit of information about that?

Jade Horton 01:16 
Yeah. So, both my parents, well, my father's passed away now, but they are abusive alcoholics. So, I grew up in a very... Sorry. Yeah, I grew up in a very abusive household. It was awful every single day. I felt like I was treading on eggshells because I never knew how my parents were going to be reacting to certain things. They were always attacking each other, drinking every day. And it wasn't until I got older that I sort of understood that it was alcohol because when you're a little kid, you don't really understand what alcohol is. So, I would then see how much they were drinking. We were very known to the police as well because my father would just get arrested, sleep off in a cell, and then literally get dropped off the next morning. But years ago, then, domestic abuse wasn't really recognised and not supported either. So, a few things that I do remember because I blocked a lot of it out in my mind. There was one time that my father came home, very, very drunk. I don't know where he'd been. And an argument started to happen. He was then going round every room because it was quite a big house we lived in, pulling out the phone lines because I was trying to get there to ring the police. Managed to get to the one in the dining room. And all I had to say is my surname. So, they knew who we were. So, they come, take him away. And that was awful. There's so many. But there was another one where he came home, and it was really, really bad. So, I got woken up by my mother, told to get out of bed. I was just in my little nightie. I must have been about eight years old. And she said, we've got to go. So, we're trying to flee out the house as quickly as we can. We didn't even have time to put shoes on. So, we're running up the road. It must have been about two, three o'clock in the morning. And we got halfway up the road. And I said, my feet really hurt because obviously stones and gravel and things. So, we ended up having to go back. So, quickly she ran inside, got our pair of shoes, and then we went to our Nands, which wasn't too far away. And I do remember it was a Friday evening because that stuck with me because I couldn't go to ballet the next day because I always did ballet on a Saturday. But I felt safe at my Nands house. So, that's one thing.

Andy Smith 04:01 
How old were you that age?

Jade Horton 04:03 
Yeah, about eight, eight, nine years old, but this was just a regular occurrence all the time. Some days it wasn't too bad, other days it was prolific. So you'd wake up and my mother would be wiping the walls of blood and my father used to like to urinate everywhere just to aggravate. The only time I ever saw him sober was when we were in Florida and I was about three years old because he knew over there if you start to hit your wife you're going to get locked up, whereas over here it was a lot more lenient than it was. So that was a quite nice holiday obviously, but I mean we went all over the place abroad but it was never nice because you knew what was going to happen and when you got back as well. It was a lot to deal with as a child and I felt like I needed to protect my younger brother as well, so you end up growing up quicker than you should and I didn't really have a childhood.

Andy Smith 05:12 
I almost felt like normal life at some point in the year. Yeah, it did. Yeah, yeah.

Jade Horton 05:15 
Yeah, because when something happens all the time, it does become normal to you. And outside looking in, people used to see a nice big car, nice beautiful house, holidays, dressed beautifully. Oh, they're a lovely family, but behind the list, it was just not that at all. It was the total opposite. I was two years behind at school academically in primary school because I'd get flashbacks, things just running through my head all the time and I couldn't concentrate. But the school did know, but I didn't think they knew quite to that extent. They were told that under no circumstances that my father should pick us up because he used to try and pick us up drunk and drive us home. So they did put a stop to that. So there was a little bit of safety there, but it was just horrendous, really.

Andy Smith 06:12 
So outside forces could see this going on as well, so where you guys were thinking it was more normal life, you can kind of pick up on the idea that it's not because other people are telling you it's not normal now and they're putting things in to prevent it from happening. And you told me before this interview that you're one of six? Yes, one of six children. So there was a few of you around. Did the rest of the siblings have this similar experience?

Jade Horton 06:38 
Yes and no. So my mother wasn't as bad with their father. She did still drink, but it wasn't as much as when she met mine. But there was still abuse there. But they feel sorry for me and my younger brother because we did get it the worst. There was just no way you could turn because you feel embarrassed as well because you don't want to tell people what's happening at home. And there just wasn't a lot of support then either. There wasn't many hostels that we could possibly go to. Ideally we should have been putting hair really because both parents were not fit to bring up children at all. And the stuff that we saw, no child should see. It's just dreadful.

Andy Smith 07:26 
And do you think this, you bought this into future relationships, is that something you brought forward with you?

Jade Horton 07:34 
Yeah. Unintentionally, obviously. I've had a couple of relationships that I've been very narcissistic. The first one being my children's father. He charmed me in the beginning, loved bomb me, all the works, trying to reel me in, thinking that he's a great guy, and then slowly started to chip away at me. But I didn't recognize it because, again, it was normal in my childhood. So for somebody that's never been through any sort of abuse, they'd be like, hang on a minute. I'm not going to accept that. Whereas I did. I was a people pleaser. I wanted to be loved, and I was looking in the wrong places for it.

Andy Smith 08:20 
They say that women also look for people like their fathers and you know, so if you've got that role model to look for, that's what you start searching for and finding and almost feel secure in that kind of setup.

Jade Horton 08:32 
Yeah, you do because that's all you know. To be in a normal relationship is abnormal to somebody like me. It's not now because I've done a lot of healing now, but before I just used to take it until it got to the point where I'd had enough and I didn't actually recognise myself. When I looked in the mirror, I just thought, who is this person? I'm just a shell and I'm just always on edge. I was always in fight or flight mode. It was, yeah, not a good time for me at all. And that was a seven year relationship of constant abuse. Yeah, it was

Andy Smith 09:13 
And that's been recognised now because I think you told me that he's in prison now. He is, yeah. He's serving time for some of the things that he's done in the past. Yes, yeah. Can you go into that tour? Yeah, yeah.

Jade Horton 09:24 
Yeah so he's currently in prison for rape and two sexual assaults so he's got six years for that and that was just a six month relationship he had with a lady. I've been in contact with her for the whole duration of how long it's taken because it's taken four years to get to court. This was last November I think and I watched him get sentenced he didn't like it. He turned around he looked at me quite shocked thinking what are you doing here because it was in Edinburgh of all places at the Supreme Court and he then smirked and then laughed at me and then turned around and didn't look at me after that but I found that quite an empowering experience because I've always feared him. I don't anymore and it's to show that you know I'm sitting there with an ex-partner of his and we're sitting there united together because he's got what he deserves and justice has been done for her. A little bit of that was for me as well because he's done it to me so I never felt comfortable in coming forward to the police. At the time when that happened with this lady the police did come to me and asked would you do a statement because it would help the lady that said that he's raped her and I did to start with and then I retracted it because I didn't want any backlash from him, his family, he was always making threats to burn the house down, my car, yeah basically tried to make my life very uncomfortable so it put me off and I didn't want to do it but I feel a lot stronger now and now that he's had this conviction I do feel other ladies will come forward and there is quite a few since me. I think about five that I can think off the top of my head he's done it too. It's just prolific.

Andy Smith 11:28 
And, you know, we're going to bring up some more wounds and stuff in this podcast. Obviously, I'm really apologize for that, you know, but, you know, you're one of the reasons why we're doing this and why you wanted to be in the podcast specifically is to empower other people to do these things and to go, you know, that have been through this experience and can share your experience with others so that hopefully they can do it. And even in this case, which is just a small part of your story and part of your picture, you want to empower people to have that voice and come forward and do what they need to do. Do you have, do you still have a relationship with your parents at the moment?

Jade Horton 12:06 
No. So my father passed away when I was 21. I didn't have a relationship with him from the age of 12 upwards because my mother divorced him then. She did try and dump us on him a few times, which was very scary because you think, I don't want to go to the other parent, one's, you know, really bad, but he's even worse. But that was just like mind games that she did with us, which was very nasty. Sorry, what did you say again? I can't remember.

Andy Smith 12:37 
Your relationship with your parents.

Jade Horton 12:39 
Yeah, yeah. So yeah, my mother, it's always been quite fractious. Throughout my life, she would ring you up very drunk. This could be any time of the day, sometimes it was morning, and she'd just keep ringing and ringing and ringing until you answered. And if you didn't answer the abusive texts you used to start, and you get this anxiety, as soon as the phone would ring, you'd look and think, and all these things would run through your head thinking, will she be drunk? Will she be sober? Will she have a go at me? Will she have a go at one of my other siblings? Am I all right to answer this call? So that used to happen all the time, and I'd answer, sometimes she was okay. And then it was like the sense of relief that she was actually having a go at one of my other siblings, and it wasn't me. So we used to joke and go, whose flavour of the month? Because it used to change. I used to be like a little favourite, and then she'd hate me, and then she'd go on to the next one. So I stopped contact with her in 2021, and that was August. I haven't spoken to her since. I don't want to speak to her. I used to hate her. I don't anymore. It's a lot for me to forgive what she's done. But for me, when you hold in so much hate, it starts to affect you in many ways. So I've let that go. It has been very difficult to do, but I have. And I've energetically sent her love and peace and forgiveness, and I've just kept it at that because I don't want somebody in my life that causes me pain. And it brings up all sorts of things as well with my childhood. So I don't feel that is good in my life. Even though she is my mother and she gave birth to me and she's blurred, doesn't mean I should have her in my life if she's so nasty. It's like anybody, isn't it? I don't feel I should have to put up with it.

Andy Smith 14:53 
Yeah, and we were saying off this, off there before, you know, that it's important to surround yourself with people that bring something to your life, you know, and my wife's typical one of, you know, she, she will, she's quite a lot more cutthroat than I am. I'm, I'm a bit of a people pleaser. I like to keep everybody happy. She kind of, you know, if someone's not bringing something to the life, then it's, you know, it's, she's got a very small circle and I think that's important to have now because positive thinking, positive energy, which we'll come on to, you know, is, is so powerful. Sorry to do this to you. Take you back to that day. I want to talk about 10th of December, 2020. So it was obviously just four, five years ago. So it's not a long time, but I think you'll say a lot has happened since then and progressed, but can you take us back to the morning and how that day progressed and what happened?

Jade Horton 15:44 
Yeah, so it was about seven o'clock in the morning. I was in bed and I could hear this alarm and I thought, what is it? And then I could hear my daughter screaming for me because it was a three story house and I was at the top and her bedroom was just on the landing bit next to mine. So as I open the door, I'm hit with this thick black smoke and the most intense heat I've ever experienced in my life. I'm trying to open my daughter's door and I can't open it. And I don't know whether that was because of the heat. It got jammed, I don't know. So I'm shouting at her saying I'm going to get help. So I run back into my bedroom because I couldn't get down the stairs. The stairs had already gone. There was like a couple of stairs and that was it. So it was just chaotic really. So I did fire taking the stairs. Yeah, yeah. So I ran to the window. I was trying to find my phone but couldn't see it because then the smoke started to come into the room. With fire safety, you're supposed to close doors and things like that, but when you're actually in it, you don't think of these things. You just need to get help. So I opened the bedroom window. I'm screaming, trying to see if anybody can hear me. And there was a lady walking down the back of the gardens. She looks up and says, what's happened? So I said, the house was on fire. She rings the emergency services and then I'm trying to look for my phone. I managed to find it because it was on the floor and I had to keep dipping down to the floor and coming back up because I was inhaling so much smoke. And then the chaos was even more. So there was people coming into the garden. I was like, can you open the back door to one of these guys? And obviously it was locked, so he couldn't do that. And then I said, look, my children are inside as well because my partner at the time had just left to go to work, literally just left. So I'm stood at this window and I know it was two and a half minutes because of the timing of when I called my partner and set the houses on fire to the time of when I landed. So I can still hear my daughter screaming and I then hear my partner come in and I can hear his voice and he's like, where are you, where are you? And I'm shouting in the bedroom, she's in her bedroom, where's Isaac? Because he was on the middle floor. And I could hear other voices as well. So I didn't know who was in the house. Now I know that it was my partner and two other neighbours that went in because the fire service, there was I think about five different areas of firefighters that came. They deemed it too dangerous to go in at the time. So my partner was like, I can't just stand here and watch. So he went in with two others. I'm still stood at the window. There's lots of people in the garden talking to me. I'm crying because I just don't know what's happening and then all of a sudden they're saying, you've got to jump now, you've got to jump. So I'm thinking my children have got out, they've been saved. So I sort of had to get up over the windowsill, dangle my legs over the window. And at that moment, it's like a fight or flight, isn't it? I just thought if I stay in the house, I know I'm going to die. If I jump, I could die also, but I don't want to burn to death. So I jumped. It was about a 30 foot drop onto concrete and I landed on my feet and my bottom at the same time, but slightly to my right-hand side. So the right-hand side of me is a lot worse than the left. When I landed, I did hear the crunch of a lot of bones being shattered and I then had this near-death experience. And what happened was there was this massive, bright white light. It was the whitest light I've ever seen. It was like really, really blinding. And then I felt like my soul was coming out of my body. It was very bizarre. And then I was like being lifted into the air, but I felt held so much love and compassion. It was a very beautiful experience and so warm. It was just, I can't put it into words how euphoric it was. And then all of a sudden I felt this pressure come back into my physical body. And that's when I took my first breath, but apparently my eyes were still open when I was having this experience. I found it very difficult to breathe. And people are like, are you all right? All right. And all I could see was just all these broken bones, my wrist. There was bone sticking out my right foot. There was bone sticking out. There was a lot of blood. And all of a sudden I heard this boom and all the glass shattered. And I had glass sticking in my back. It was just everywhere. So at that point, people in the Guardian, also my partner, decided to move me. So not knowing what injuries I had, my partner had my ankles. And somebody was underneath my arms and they dragged me around the corner. I don't know how long it was until the emergency services got there, like the ambulance. However, whilst I was laying there, I kept asking, where are my children? And no one would look at me. And this went on for a little bit longer. I kept saying, where are they? Where are they? Just no eye contact. And all of a sudden my partner dipped his head down, shook his head. And I made this animal roar. It was very harrowing for everybody to hear. Still sticks with people now because of that noise. Then the ambulance came. I was still fully awake. And I remember because I didn't know whether I'd hit my head or anything like that because I was dazed. So I do remember from during first aid years ago that if you have got a head concussion, you've got to try and stay awake. So I'm telling this lady next to me who's stroking my head, I've got to stay awake. I've got to stay awake. And then they put the pain relief in me. I do remember some guy actually filming me laying there. And there was one person that said, what are you doing? And he said, well, I'm just making sure that I can prove to my boss that I can't get to work because it's gridlock because there's just all sorts here, which was very insensitive of him doing. But people react to things in different ways, don't they? So I then get put into the ambulance. And then all of a sudden I get this memory back. And I kept saying, I think it's my ex-partner that's done this because three months before it happened, because we only lived there for six months. It hadn't been there very long. He said, you'll know when it's burning and I'll happily watch you die. You FNC and T.

Andy Smith 23:21 
This wasn't your current part of the time, does it? No, no, no. Children's fathers said this.

Jade Horton 23:26 
Um, so I'm saying this in the ambulance. I think it's him. I think it's him. So obviously they contact the police and I was in and out of consciousness. So I'd wake up and it was like torture because I'd wake up and realize where I was and then realize what happened, then fall back to sleep again. And it was like that all the time. So I woke up in hospital and there was a couple of police officers in the room and my partner's trying to get to my phone, but he can't remember the pin. So once I'm awake, he says, you need to open your phone, Jay. They need to look at the message that you said about. So I was like, okay. Gave it to one of the police officers. And I said, look, I've got 10 years of text messages on here because I've kept them. They're all very abusive. He's the one that says that because I think it's him. Um, I said, I don't think he would ever, ever hurt his children, but he would hurt me. Um, so he read that, actually not jot it down. And then he's then looking at the other messages and he said, uh, yeah, he's delightful, isn't he? Yeah. I've had it for a very long time. Uh, even after getting rid of him, it still continued. And the way in with that was he would just contact me about the children, but also have abuse added onto that. But we did have, um, a restraining order for a year after I got rid of him because he was just so threatening and abusive and wouldn't leave me alone. Um, but he, he behaved sort of after that. So there was no need to have another restraining order, but I felt safer when I had that because it gave me a little bit more protection. Um, so then families start to come in the room and drips and drops because I've got family all over the UK. And again, in and out of consciousness, I'm not really understanding what's happening. Um, and what injuries I have. And when I wake up again, I can see all my family around my bed. And then this chaplain walks in. I'm thinking, this isn't good. I'm going to die. Aren't I? So I said, um, you need to go away. I'm not dying today. Um, and it was, it was lovely. I actually became quite good friends with him after that. Cause he visited me daily. I'm not religious at all. I don't know religion. Um, but he was a nice little safety net for me to have some sort of contact. Uh, and that's when I started to learn what injuries I actually had. So that's a long list. Um, I shattered both my heel bones, my ankles, uh, my pelvis, my sacrum, my spine in four places, um, my sternum, right hip sockets, right wrist, all my toes, these two fingers. Um, just trying to think if there's anything else. Uh, oh, and I had a lung contusion, contusion as well. Um, and because of the open fracture on my right foot, I had to have a skin graft as well. So that was done, I think about five, six days later, cause they tried to sew it up and it kept reopening. So that's why I had to have that done. Um, the operations were nine, 10 hours long. So I've got metal work in my ankles. I've got screws and plates, screws and plates in my wrist, um, two big long screws at the back of my pelvis, keeping my pelvis together. And they decided to keep my spine as it was because I had Cordra Quina syndrome in 2018, which is quite a rare condition that can basically the disc and perforate the spinal cord and paralyze you. So they didn't want to make it any worse. So they just said, look, we'll, we'll see if it just can heal on its own. But when I looked at the X-rays and the MRIs, it does look still quite a mess cause it's all mashed together. Um, but.

Andy Smith 27:42 
Let's, let's come to your, so we've gone through all the lists of your injuries, we'll come to your healing. At one point, I just want to read it back a tiny bit first. You know, listening to your story is just, is just unimaginable for most people, right? You know, especially for myself, I've got two girls, I've got a six-year-old and, you know, a three-year-old, even thinking about it now, it's making me quite emotional. Having to go through that and your children perishing the fire is just unthinkable for so many people. Where, so you, you know, you're, you're in the hospital, you've understood the severity of what's happened. Where do you even start?

Jade Horton 28:28 
Uh, it's kind of

Andy Smith 28:31 
You know, for other people to understand where do you go from there, you know, what is, you've got to deal with the understanding first. And then what's going on in, you know, in your head to then get through that pace.

Jade Horton 28:47 
Basically, you've got two choices, you even live or you die. And at that point, I did want to die because my purpose were my children. Sienna and Isaac were my world. And when that's been ripped away from you, it's very hard to come back from that and also having to deal with all the physical injuries I've got. And then laying there in absolute excruciating pain, even though you've been given all this pain relief, it's just not touching it because the severity was, it was just extreme. I then actually started to, it was obviously PTSD, I started to start to see smoke in the room a lot. So that we used to panic me and I'd be like, because I couldn't move. And then that's when a psychologist came in because I turned around to my mother and I said, I just want to die. I'm looking around the hospital room to see if I can grab something to kill myself with, because that is exactly what I wanted to do. And so that's when she brought in this psychologist and I spoke with her very frankly and said, I want to die. What is the point in me living? Look at the state of me. I've lost my children. I can't cope. No parent should ever go through that. And so...

Andy Smith 30:05 
That feeling that people will go through as normal. So, you know, you obviously not wanting to be there. You know, if I was in the same situation, I would 100% be, you know, there and, and living that moment. So where do you go from there? How can you, at what point do you start to think life is worth me being here?

Jade Horton 30:31 
Well, I'm trying to remember. What I did do is I did meditate every single day because I was trying to change my mindset of being so negative because it's a very negative experience. And I know with your mindset, if you start to try and make it better, you're going to feel better and your I'm trying to think, I would say probably halfway into being in hospital, I started to get my fight back in a way and think, no, actually I need to get better. I need to get out of here. I need to work on myself and get the help that I need. So yeah, that's what I did every single day. Just kept pushing all the time. And it wasn't a quick process. So it wasn't.

Andy Smith 31:27 
You know, this is the thing. So, you know, anyone that's going through this kind of trauma or the same sort of experiences, you can understand that this anger, this everything is normal. It's part of the process. And at some point you get to a point where you can either deal with it, accept it. And, you know, I hate saying the word move on from X. I don't think anything, everyone ever will move on from something like this, but shift happens where you can deal and experience and share with others. So, we'll come to that. We'll come to your life now, your healing, all that sort of thing. We'll touch on that soon. The actual, when you jump from the window, the accident that happened to yourself. So, again, you know, there's so many layers to this. Yes. You mentioned it is like euphoric, that feeling. Can you just take a deeper dive into that and explain what you mean?

Jade Horton 32:26 
Yeah, well, the most euphoric feeling it was my whole body tingled. I felt absolutely amazing. It was there was no pain. It was just pure, pure love that I felt. And it was similar to when I had a near death experience when I was three years old, where I actually met my great grandmother. I didn't know who she was until years later when I saw a picture. But yeah, it was I didn't want to come back. And sometimes even now, I think, you know, although I'm still living now, a part of me still feels that I shouldn't have because I should be with my children. And I look at every single day as a step closer to being with them. I'm probably going to be here until about 90. But every day is a step closer. And I do sense them. I'm quite spiritual anyway. So yeah, that that near death experience. You hear it all the time, don't you? They're very similar. No two are the same. But the light was just the brightest light ever. But it was quite short in that experience. It wasn't that long because some people actually go all the way over to the other side, don't they? And see how beautiful it is.

Andy Smith 33:43 
What do you think that was in your experience? Do you think that was the afterlife? Do you think? Yes. Yeah.

Jade Horton 33:47 
Definitely, yeah, because that's the second time I've experienced it now, very, very similar. And just the way I felt, yeah, no doubt in my mind that it was that.

Andy Smith 33:56 
Okay, so you're in hospital and after the fall, you're told that at one stage you told you're never going to walk again. Another bump in the road.

Jade Horton 34:10 
Mm-hmm.

Andy Smith 34:11 
How do you deal with that prognosis?

Jade Horton 34:14 
I was devastated when they told me the first time and then something inside me started to argue that fact and said, no, actually, yes, I will. So there was a lot of to and fro-ing with five different consultants. And I was told this nearly enough daily for seven weeks. You're never going to wall jade. It's never going to happen. You've got to basically accept this. And half of me was thinking, well, maybe they're correct because they're the professionals they've seen this day in day out. I've got five different consultants with different parts of my body telling me this. They've been doing this for a very long time. So I thought, but miracles can happen. And I kept saying, yes, I will. And they're like, no, you won't. Yes, I will. No, you won't. Yes, I will. No, you won't. And... Why do you think they...

Andy Smith 35:04 
Because we hear these stories all the time, you know, they're very adamant that you're not going to get better. Is that in medical training? Are you supposed to give people the worst case scenario so that they can work up on that?

Jade Horton 35:17 
Yeah, I think it's probably the latter that you've just said, because people need to know what their options are. However, when you keep getting told under no circumstances will you, that can set somebody back massively and they're never going to get any better because they keep being told that's never going to happen and you can't do something. I don't believe in the word can't. So I said, yes, I will. I will do it. And they're like, no, no, no, no. Yes, I will. And I did.

Andy Smith 35:50 
And that's it, and it's that mindset, I think, and I think that's such a powerful thing. Like, and, you know, I'm on the other foot, I'd rather people told me there's hope. There's, you know, it might be slim, but there is hope that you will be able to walk again, and this is how we think we can get you there sort of thing, and then you've got that. It just boggles the mind as to, you know, maybe it's just because what they can see on the scans is telling them that this isn't going to happen. So, you know, people like yourself have that driven nature to get it done, and you did get it done. What was your recovery process like? How long did it take?

Jade Horton 36:24 
Okay, so like I mentioned before, I meditated every single day, my inspiration was actually Joe Dr. Dispenser because he broke his back in six places and he mentally fixed his spine. So that's what I was trying to do. I was doing body scans of my body daily, going through bit by bit and basically sending healing really to it. I had physio every single day in hospital. The physio lady was lovely. She was like, you really have got some fighting you, haven't you? Because a lot of people go, oh no, I don't want to do it today. And I was like, no, let's do it. It started off very simple, just doing very small exercises at the top half of my body, because I couldn't move from the waist down and then sliding off the bed onto a chair on like a board, which took forever to start with because I didn't realise how quick muscle wastage set in because it's never happened to me before. It was about three, four weeks in and all my muscles were just all really flappy. And it was hard to look at my body like that because it didn't look right. So yeah, I've just kept doing physio, meditation. I would listen to different sound frequencies on the internet, different hertz, like 432 hertz, which is very healing. And I did that for 12 weeks up until I took my first steps. But I also went for magnetic therapy and it was a company called MBST. They heard about my story because there was a friend of a friend that had this company because they're franchises and that was in Stanford. So they offered me 10 sessions free to help my bones recover quicker. So I did that. Fantastic therapy. I can't fault it at all. It's just amazing. And you just basically lay there. You can't feel anything. I just sat there and I've laid there and read a book for an hour each day. So you had to do it consecutively. So it was every single day for 10 days. And I do believe that did help me in my recovery massively. And I also went to two healers as well. So they both did a different style of Reiki. And within 12 weeks, I stood up on his inner frame and walked 10 meters for the first time. It was excruciating, but absolutely magnificent at the same time. It was just an amazing experience because I thought, yes, I am on the road to recovery now. I can do this. And when you hit rock bottom, the only way is up. And you hear these sayings, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. And it really has. So every single day, I just keep practicing, practicing, practicing. And then my muscles started to work better then. So yeah, after that, I was just so concentrated on my physical recovery because I needed to get out of a wheelchair. But for me personally, I don't think I would be able to cope in a wheelchair full-time forever. It's just something I wouldn't be able to do. And I did say openly to my family and friends, if I can't walk, again, be prepared to go to my funeral because that was still in my mind because I thought I won't be able to cope. I'd even wrote my funeral plan out who I wanted to go, my music, what coffin I wanted, everything, which sounds really bizarre to a lot of people. But when you're in that situation, everything's very black and white. It seems like a lot of possibility, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it is. So yeah, I just kept doing that. And it just got better and better and better, really.

Andy Smith 40:18 
So mindset's a big thing, if anyone listened to his podcast, I might have listened to the episode of Dave Bolton and he was given a couple of months to live with brain tumor. But one of the things that he really attested to his recovery was, and the fact that he's still here today, nine, 10 years later, is his mindset and his mindset to get better and to keep going and to be here. How much do you think that played a part in all of this?

Jade Horton 40:46 
massively because when your mind is positive, especially when you're telling yourself that you can do something, your body follows suit. If you're of a very negative mindset, your body starts to react in that way. You start getting illnesses, insomnia, there's all sorts of things that can happen in your body and also your mind. So yeah, positive mindset is very, very good for somebody that has gone through a lot of things, especially that gentleman. Because if he had gone, okay, I'm going to die, that's what is going to happen. And it makes your body healthier as well. And you've got to be kind to yourself because if you're hating parts of your body or what the situation is, it affects you in every single way. And that's paramount for me. Obviously, I had a lot of negative thoughts for a while, but I would flip them again and go, look, look at the progress you're making. Look at how amazing that you've done since laying in a hospital bed, basically hemorrhaging to death and not wanting to be here to actually

Andy Smith 42:06 
And if things couldn't get any worse, if anyone noticed the date in which we said that this all happened in 2020, it was lockdown, it was COVID, it was probably the worst time for so many people not even having to deal with what you was going through. So, you know, what was your experience like in hospital during COVID?

Jade Horton 42:27 
So, I think I spent about four weeks in intensive care. So, I think the first couple of weeks I was allowed, my mother, my eldest sister was there every single day and my partner would visit every day and he would like feed me and stuff. But after that, they basically said you can't have anybody now. I went into complete meltdown. I actually screamed and said, I cannot cope. How can I be in a side dream on my own? With nobody, I've lost my entire life and now you're telling me I can't have anybody. I understood it was COVID and they've got regulations and it was complete lockdown in Adam Brooks Hospital. There was no visitors allowed. So, they actually had a big meeting because my case was very different. It's not just a car accident, you know, where you've hurt yourself. I've lost my children and they did agree to have one person. So, I felt I couldn't pick. So, it was either going to be my mother or my partner. So, my partner basically picked for me and said, you know, you need to pick your mother because you're never at the end of it if you don't. So, she stayed with me for three weeks. So, she'd come at eight o'clock in the morning and she was allowed in my room until eight at night. Sometimes the nurses would allow her a little bit longer. And at that time, we actually had a nice relationship and it was, yeah, not too bad actually. And obviously she wasn't drinking. So, she was a rock to me then. And it did help massively, but I still was very, very suicidal and that trying to cope with the pain everywhere was a lot. And every time you tried to do anything, it made it worse. But yeah, it was a very, very lonely time for me. And even after those three weeks when my mother left, I was then left on my own. So, the only communication you've got is your phone, isn't it? So, I'd text people. My phone was always going off, loads of people, friends, family asking what my recovery is like. So, I'd FaceTime a lot of people. So, that was the only connection I had. So, I do feel so much sadness for everybody that was in that situation and also care homes because it was just nothing, wasn't it? You were just left. And that causes a lot of mental health issues. And I think it still does for people now.

Andy Smith 44:57 
very lonely time. And it's not just throughout COVID times, there's people going through that home as well that are very lonely. So it's that connection that people really need.

Jade Horton 45:05 
A lot of fear as well around it.

Andy Smith 45:07 
Yeah, so going into the the practices you use to get yourself back walking, get yourself back up and running again, obviously use normal NHS hospital protocols. So you went through that process. If anything, they were just telling you, you're not going to walk again. What did you use alongside that that helped? Where was the external factors that you bought in?

Jade Horton 45:34 
Yeah, so, yeah, like I've mentioned before, meditation, I had the magnetic therapy done, I had the healers that I went to, and then I started to have an acupuncture as well, and hydrotherapy, which was everything of that combined, I think, yeah, it all complemented each other because it was helping different parts of my body. And then one day I opened Facebook up, and then I see this advert for Angelic Reiki, and I thought, never heard of that, what's that? So I thought that is a sign, because I'm very much into everything comes to you for reasons, and it was obviously, I was obviously meant to see it. So I contacted the lady, and she's local to St. Nierts, and I said, I think I need to see you, and she said, I know who you are. Because it was all in the news at the time, it was everywhere, even people in Scotland know about it. So I went to go and see her, sat there for about four hours to chat into her, felt very, very comfortable, because I'm very much in the mind of, not everybody's for everyone, so you've got to click with that person to be able to learn or do stuff with, and felt very comfortable. And what I did is, because I don't know anything about angels or archangels really, all I know is Archangel Michael, because he's an every biblical thing going. So I did two little courses, learning the main archangels, because there are so many, and then another course doing other mini healing things, before I did my practitioner's course, because I didn't feel comfortable in just going straight into that. I like to learn properly. So I did that in, I think, 2022, in the summer. Thoroughly enjoyed the course. Weirdly, when she was teaching us, it was like I already knew it. It was a very, very strange experience, like deja vu. I thought, I've been here and I've done this. And, yeah, it was quite an intensive course, so I did that, which I was very proud of, because what I wanted to do was, have a career where I'm helping people, also it's helping me, and it's something that I can do as and when, because I didn't want to be employed by somebody, because I still have days where the pain is quite harsh, and it's difficult to function, and I didn't want to put that pressure on myself and a boss. So I thought, I need to work for myself. And because holistic healing has done so much for me, I know it works, I'm a walking product of it, so why not do it? And it's something I absolutely love to do, it's a beautiful modality, and it's helping so many people. So that's what I started to do, and working with crystals, I absolutely love crystals, they're everywhere, very, very healing. And then a couple of years later, I then did my master's course. So with that, I can now teach others to be practitioners themselves if they wish to, but that's the highest sort of grade you can get in Reiki. Again, weirdly, I knew things, it was very, very strange. It's just something I absolutely love, and it doesn't feel like work. So that, for me, is fantastic, and it's a massive passion for me to be able to give this to others and help them.

Andy Smith 49:07 
Cool. Okay. So I'm gonna, sorry I keep reeling back a little bit. That's okay. I want to just touch on all of the different things that you did to help heal because anyone going through similar situations, like obviously when you say meditation, things like that. Yeah. You know what that is because you have been in it, you've lived it, you've done it. Yes. What did meditation look like for you?

Jade Horton 49:25 
Uh, so I basically went on YouTube and I Googled guided meditation to start with. So it's somebody speaking, you know, telling you to lay down and they're going bit by bit with your body saying, you know, relax your ankles, relax your face, things like that. Uh, very, very relaxing music. And it depends on what you want really, your duration time. Some of them are half an hour. Some can go on for a lot longer. And then once you start to get used to that, you can then do it on your own, you don't need somebody talking to you, saying what you need to do. So I don't do guided anymore. Um, everything, I just Googled everything. I just basically researched everything that I could think of to, to help. So yeah, that's basically what I did with the meditation, but it's, it does help.

Andy Smith 50:16 
because it shows how simple that is and how simple it is to get into it. People think meditation is quite scary. Where do you start? What do you, you know, and it's, and it's as simple as finding a video, guided meditation, start there, start learning how to do it yourself thereafter. So you mentioned magnetic therapy as well. And you touched on it, but who introduced you to that? Where does, because a lot of people when we talk about PMF talk about magnetic therapy, never heard of it before. It's not something that people actively go looking for. Yes. So where did that come about?

Jade Horton 50:48 
Okay. So I knew about PMF because originally it was used for horses, wasn't it? When, when they go lame and things like that, when they have injuries and it's fantastic. So somebody actually said, get a PMF machine. So I looked into that and that was still in the back of my mind, but it wasn't until a friend contacted me and said, I've got a friend that's got this business. They really want to help you. And I was like, what is it? And she said, it's magnetic therapy. It's a bit like an MRI, but it's open. You're just laying on a bed, um, a hard bed. And there's different processes. The one that I had helped my bones spoke because osteoporosis can set in. And it, it basically kickstarts everything and it speeds up all your cells in your body and helps you heal quicker. It's absolutely fantastic. Anybody that's got injuries should go and have it done. Um, they do get a lot of footballers that go there because they get injuries with their ankles, legs and things like that. And their recovery time is cut at least in half. It's a lot quicker and then it can be back on the field again. So it's, it's a very, very good machine. Um, I also had one where they dealt with my nerve pain. So in my right leg from the knee down, I've got extreme pain. It's like constant pins and needles all the time. And it feels like somebody's sort of compressing my leg and foot and even just sitting here now, I can feel it, but I've got used to it now. It's not as bad as it was. Uh, so I had that done and that actually enabled me to start moving my ankle a little bit as well, because again, they said that's never going to move. Uh, cause it was so severe in that, in that side of my body. Um, I forgot what I was going to say.

Andy Smith 52:43 
So using that, so that was an MBS-T machine, I think, to give them some credit. This is the device that you used in your recovery and that's a device that is mainly in professional settings. It's quite a big setup, isn't it? It's not as big as an MRI scanner, but it's something you lay inside of and it does the magnetic therapy with you kind of in the middle. Because I educate myself, I kind of want to know what intensity that machine was. Is it something you felt or could you just hear it more than anything?

Jade Horton 53:14 
I couldn't hear anything. It was like silent. I didn't feel anything either. It was a bit bizarre really. You're just laying there reading books after an hour and it's like, is it working? Because I can't feel anything. They're fantastic machines. They really are. So it was just, yeah, it was just basically a bed. There's no like covering or anything. You're just laying there. Yeah, I didn't feel a thing at all.

Andy Smith 53:41 
It's good. It just explains to me that it's a more of a lower intensity device. I have frequencies I think they work with. Oh, tell a liar.

Jade Horton 53:47 
Actually, my metalwork warmed up slightly. Yeah, that was it. Which is quite normal. Yeah, I've just remembered that. Yeah.

Andy Smith 53:53 
To do with the induction of the magnetic field, so yeah, no, it's really interesting to find out, you know, and if other people want to find these sorts of things, you can find them in clinics, so we can probably link that down as well, so. And yeah, that was your introduction to magnetic therapies, and would you find that you would get an instant result from those, or was it, how many sessions did you have with that?

Jade Horton 54:16 
I had 10 sessions which had to be done every single day, so they even opened up on a Sunday so that I could do the whole lot. Generally, I'm trying to remember from memory, is between three and six months. Because of the severity of my injuries, it was going to take a bit longer than just a sprain. So I had that done and then I went back a year later because they gave me that complimentary, which was lovely because it's worth, I don't know what it is now, but I think it was about £1,250 just for those 10 sessions. So I went back a year later and then had it redone again and also had the nerve pain done because at the time, I don't know whether it's still true, but it's the only machine at the moment that actually combats nerve pain. So I had that done on my leg and I had 10 sessions of that as well. So I had to do one lot first and then do the other and I started to see results in weeks. It wasn't months. I don't know whether that's because I had it done again. I'm not entirely sure, but it's important to me to keep having stuff done because I am still healing. Yeah.

Andy Smith 55:38 
Yeah, so let's talk about Reiki in a minute, because that was another one, and I've called it Reiki this time, because it's a common misconception for people to call it Reiki, which is what I was doing when I walked in here and corrected me, so it's great, we'll get in there. Before we talk about the Reiki, why was your decision to look at alternative therapies? You know, a lot of people will obviously go through the NHS process, through hospitals in America or wherever they're based. Why did you take that leap into the holistic or alternative complementary side?

Jade Horton 56:13 
One reason, well, there's a few reasons. One is I only had limited physiotherapy. It was basically off you go, you're never going to walk, you'll be bedridden in a wheelchair. You've got to accept it. So I didn't get anything else from them. So I've always known about holistic therapies, but not really done it because I've never needed to in the past. So I do believe that holistic therapies is fantastic. It's natural. It's not where you take a medication. Because at the time I was taking 60 tablets a day, I was having these massive big bottles of oxycodone, which is double the strength of morphine. It's basically fentanyl heroin. So I was basically a pharmaceutical heron addict, not through choice. Which is a huge problem. Yeah, massively. And it's difficult to get off. Very difficult to get off. Yeah. It was a big thing in America a while ago, wasn't there, where they were promoting it as being non-addictive. It's great. Yeah. Yeah. I've watched quite a few films of that and it does hit home because it's destroyed so many people's lives. So yeah, a heavy medication. I started to wean myself down because I was like, I need to get off some of this stuff. Also, because I was then getting more mobile, I needed to do this because you're not going to get the root cause of a bottle of a pill bottle. I can't stress this enough. It just masks things. And that's all that pharmaceutical industries do. They just basically promote all these drugs and then off you go. Nothing ever gets done really. And GPs as well, not every GP is the same, but I had a great GP years ago that would never give you prescription to stuff. You'd be like, you need to do this, this, this, and this. You don't need tablets. But there's more people that actually do. So I slowly started to come off things. So I'm no longer an antidepressants. I was on them for a very long time, even before the house fire, because of all the abuse I had from childhood and adulthood. I think I started taking them in 2011. So it's a long, long time on them. And they're only supposed to be meant for short term, but however, they just kept carrying on. So I came off those because I needed to feel more. And there's a saying, you need to feel to heal, because I was quite numb to a lot of things. I'd watch a program and normally for somebody else, it would probably make them cry, depending on what it is. And I'd have no response, nothing. And that was important to me to start feeling more. So I gradually came off them. Then all the other tablets as well. So from 60, I think, what am I now on? 20 now, which is massive. It's taken a while to do because a lot of them are very, very strong. However, I do believe I will come off all of them completely. But again, it's going to take a little bit of time to do. But having all this holistic therapies done has contributed to getting my medication down, because if I didn't do all of that, I would still have to take so much pain relief. And that's not good on your body, your stomach, anything, long term. So yeah, that's what I did.

Andy Smith 59:36 
Yeah. No, it's good. And you've still got that positive mindset. You've got a goal.

Jade Horton 59:39 
Yes.

Andy Smith 59:39 
Get yourself down on these. So Reiki, talk to me about Reiki. So let's, what was your introduction to Reiki? Why did you have it go into that route? And for a lot of people, can you explain what is Reiki? Because I think, you know, obviously you understand that you live it every day. So, but there'll be people listening to this and they have heard of it, but maybe not an alien word.

Jade Horton 01:00:05 
Yeah, so Reiki is basically energy healing. Sometimes you can place your hands on the person because there's different types of Reiki. There's so many. Or you don't touch the person at all, but it's done with your hands and crystals. So when I do healing, I tend to get quite hot and my hands get really hot, although I go really cold. That means different things for me. So normally when they're cold, it means there's some sort of arthritis there in a person's body. And I don't think when I'm doing it, I just, it's really hard to explain it. I just get guided to know where I'm going around the body. And yeah, I can manipulate the energy because everybody's got like an aura. So it's an invisible layer all the way around your body. Some people can see the colours. Normally, when you see an aura, you have to be behind a white wall, and then you sort of zone your eyes out and then you see, it's really weird, like a halo to start with, like a bright light around and then the colour starts to happen. But the aura can change, but you do normally have a primary colour. Mine's pink. I can't remember all of them now because they're all different, but it's all the colours of the rainbow. And seven is quite a significant number in a lot of spiritual things. So there's seven chakras. So they're energy centres in your body and they're up the spine. And how I explain them is, you know, like a Dyson hoovering, you've got like the little cyclones everywhere. So they're like little spinny wheels going round. So when they're blocked, which can happen to anybody, the energy isn't flowing freely around your body. So then that can start to manifest in physical illnesses. So if somebody gets a lot of headaches and things like that, or one of their chakra is blocked. So the way you unblock those is I use Tuning Forks. So they're, I want to explain they're like two prongs and then you tap them and then you either place it on the person's body, or you can do it around the person's body. So I've got a set of seven for every single chakra and they're set at a different frequency for that chakra. And that starts to break up the blockage and then the energy starts to flow more. The other way I check is with a crystal pendulum. So it will tell me whether it's blocked or not. And also how wide your aura is, because if it's quite thin, that means there's some pain or injury around the body. So for instance, I could go around somebody's head and it could probably be about that wide. And then it will go really, really thin. I think, right, there's an issue here. So once I've done all the healing, I will then go around and check again to make sure that it's been dealt with. Some people find that their body tingles. Sometimes their pain can get a little bit more whats the word.

Andy Smith 01:03:05 
Intense yeah, so it kind of bring it out. Yeah, yeah, yeah

Jade Horton 01:03:09 
Yes, so it will be more intense, but that does die down again and it's shown that it's working. And sometimes people don't feel anything, but it doesn't mean it's not worked either because everything's energy and just because you can't see something doesn't mean it's not there. Wi-Fi boxes, for instance, for people that think that Reiki is airy-fairy mumbo-jumbo, it's not. It's real. It works. I mean, there's frequencies and everything, isn't there? Of course there is.

Andy Smith 01:03:40 
When you tell people that there's frequencies in a Wi-Fi box or there's frequencies in sound, they understand. They get that. It makes sense, you know, and a lot of music producers now put certain frequencies in their music, which is like addictive and sets off what you would call a chakra. And it's their energy. They like their vibe off it. So, you know, frequencies are something that a lot of people, when you say that, it goes into this woo-woo space. And, you know, it's something that needs to come back out and almost be put into the medical practices. Oh, yes. Because, say, the profound recovery you've had hasn't just been through the medical practice. It's been through these different types of healing.

Jade Horton 01:04:25 
Yeah, massively. I do know they do have people that do reiki with cancer patients in some hospitals and care places, but I do feel it should be in every single hospital going. Also, the magnetic therapy needs to be in a hospital, every single hospital, because it would...

Andy Smith 01:04:47 
Yeah, getting people out of, I mean, you know, we tried to do another thing.

Jade Horton 01:04:51 
you know, out the hospital quicker as well. Yeah, yeah.

Andy Smith 01:04:53 
That's the thing, you know, we tried doing something with the NHS many years ago to prove to them that we could get patients out the beds quicker, you know, because we had to go at that angle. Yes. Because it was a cost saving activity. And although the study was great, and it was, it just still didn't resonate with them. So it's just very frustrating.

Jade Horton 01:05:11 
is. You're just hitting a brick wall all the time. Out of my five consultants, four of them are completely on board of what I do because they were like, how on earth have you managed to do this? I'll reel it all off and they're like, wow. One's still very scientific and it's like, no, I don't believe in it. I don't even understand how you're walking, Jade, but it's fantastic. Goodbye. Which is fine. You can't push it on people, but making people aware that there is alternative things out there that are natural and don't have side effects.

Andy Smith 01:05:42 
Yeah, why not? Why not try it?

Jade Horton 01:05:45 
But yeah, we've got nothing to lose, nothing.

Andy Smith 01:05:48 
And I think that's a message to a lot of people that it's like trying to get this out to people. It's like there's no risks involved in this, then at least give it a try. It's we're moving away from calling things holistic and alternative. We're moving into the world of complementary. And I think that really does work because it's we're not telling you to stop taking tablets. We're not telling you to, you know, it's try this alongside it and see what the effects are. Yeah. So I think it's really good. Yeah, it is. You mentioned people using Reiki for cancer. But what's your main audience? Should we say who comes to you a lot of the time?

Jade Horton 01:06:23 
Right. So, a mixture of people really, a lot of women, I have had, I think, four males that I've done now, because they're not as forthcoming, men are more logical minded. So yeah, it's more female based. I get people that are struggling with sleep. Insomnia, people that suffer with that, different parts of the body where there's pain, a lot of people with backache, because that's quite hard to treat, really. What else? Loads of things. But there's one individual, a friend of mine that I used to work with when we were in the prison service years ago, he's paralyzed from the waist down. And I felt a real big pull and I was drawn to help him. So, I mean, I hadn't spoken to him for a few years, because when you move out of jobs, you don't tend to keep in contact with everybody. So, you lose touch. So, when I learned that he's had this accident, I thought, I really need to help him. So, I contacted him. He was in Corby hospital and I said, look, I'll come over and have a chat with you. This is what I do now. Are you interested? And he was like, I don't really believe in it, Jade. I was like, that's absolutely fine, but would you allow me to do it? You're not going to lose anything by trying it. He was like, yeah, crack on. So, I did it. He felt really relaxed afterwards. He was like, that was nice. So, I waited because I knew he was going to sleep better until the next day. And I rang him and I said, how did you feel? What happened? He went, I slept like a baby. Can you please come back next week? I went, yes, I can. So, as the weeks went on, I sometimes get visions when I do Reiki. So, it could be names. It could be flashes of different things. It could be spirit animals. So, I had three names for him and it kept repeating my head because I kept ignoring it. It was possibly one of my guides. I'm not too sure. So, I relayed it to him and he sort of looked at me, started laughing. I thought, oh no, I'm nuts. And he was like, how do you know those names? I was like, because something told me them. And he was like, what? And I said, yeah, I'm a little bit psychic sometimes. So, one of them was a friend of his that had recently passed away. One was his nurse because he was like, how? I don't understand how you can get this. So, I'll try to explain to him what and how. Because everybody has got the ability to see sense and hear things, but you've just got to be open to it and keep practicing. But some people have just got the natural gift and it comes like that. So, yeah, I'd get things all the time. So, I said, look, I keep seeing this wolf. I think this is a spirit animal for you. And he actually was dreaming of wolves prior. So, that was quite a good confirmation for me. And then he rang me one day and he said, I had a dream. I was walking with this wolf. What does it mean? And I said, what do you think it means? And he went, I'm going to walk again. And I said, yeah, I do believe he will. And I will do Reiki for you until you get out that wheelchair because I strongly believe he will do it. And his mindset is very positive now. Obviously, in the beginning with anybody with injuries, you're down.

Jade Horton 01:09:45 
You think, oh, what can I do now? And my life's changed. But when you start switching, things start to happen. And his body started to move parts of his body that he was told would never work again. So, he can see that progress. So, that's really great for him to carry on having modalities like this because it shows other people that it can work.We're not doctors. We're not miracle workers. We are assisting in channeling that energy to give to that person to make their body heal quicker.

Andy Smith 01:10:21 
OK, so this might be quite a difficult question. Yeah. If you could go back to that day after everything had happened on 10th December and you had the opportunity to talk to yourself, is there any advice you could give yourself at that moment in time? And the reason I'm asking that is because there may be people that have found this podcast in that situation now, you know, they're looking for other people that have been through this or, you know, so is there an advice if you answer it in terms of yourself, they can hopefully relate to them.

Jade Horton 01:10:58 
I would say, don't ever give up because you have got possibilities there. If you put limitations on yourself, that's all you're going to get. If you broaden your mind and think that, you know, that there's, there's a wider opportunities there, just don't give up and speak to people and be open of how you're feeling because there's so many sayings, isn't there? Problem solved is, I'm trying to remember, problem solved is problem halved. So yeah, it is, don't give up. There is hope in, in everything and in my experience, it was a dreadful experience and a situation that not many people can come back from. However, I can see how much I've grown. And if I hadn't have done that and said, you know, I'm going to give up, that's my life gone and I'm not going to be sat here doing this now, you know? So yeah, do not give up. Just, just reach out to people if you're struggling and yeah, just, just keep going.

Andy Smith 01:12:09 
Yeah, no, 100%. And, you know, we want to thank you, obviously, for being on the podcast because of your courage to share this story. There's so many people that could be suffering in silence and, you know, not want to be exposed to this. And the way you explain the situation, the things you've been through is very courageous. And, you know, it's we're in awe of what you're doing. So thank you for that. In terms of your healing journey, are you looking to do anything else? Are you wanting to grow? What's for the future for Jade?

Jade Horton 01:12:44 
Yeah, so Reiki normally is, you know, face-to-face. I can do distant Reiki, but I would love to branch out into breath work because breath work is another thing that I have started to do. And that has helped me release a lot of suppressed emotions that I have still got stored in my body. Because it's a process, isn't it, of healing? You never stop. You're always healing yourself in some sort of way. So that really resonated for me. So I thought that would be fantastic to complement with Reiki. And just the other day, actually, I was speaking to a friend of mine and she mentioned there was something called laughter yoga. And I was like, what's that? It's not yoga at all. It's basically letting go of the ego and laughing. Because laughing releases so many chemicals in your brain. Makes you feel good. And when you're depressed, got anxiety, if you are in a situation where you're laughing, what does that do? It makes you feel better, doesn't it? And it releases stuff in your body. So that's another thing that I'm gonna go down a route of. So yeah, once I do those two things, there possibly might be other things that I'll branch out into, maybe coaching even. Because I have been through so much in my life, I could possibly help a lot of people. I do help bereaved families at the moment. There is a couple locally that are quite new into their grief journey. So I've pointed them in the right direction of things that works for me. It's not necessarily gonna work for them because everybody's individual. However, when you're in that mist of everything, you can't think. So somebody that can guide you and tell you, there's these options, there's this that has helped massively. And also just sitting there and talking to me because I know what it's like. No two losses are the same. However, we're in a club that we never wanted to be in and no parent should, but we all help each other. There is support groups out there that can help.

Andy Smith 01:14:49 
powerful and your admiration to keep helping and giving back. Yeah, and I'm very open about it, you know.

Jade Horton 01:14:54 
So I think that's why people gravitate towards me. They always have. They're like, I've just told you my life story and I don't even understand why. It's like, I'm very comfortable. But yeah, it's just the way I'm really.

Andy Smith 01:15:07 
And something you mentioned there, I think is quite nice message is that people should put themselves into more uncomfortable situations more like outside of their comfort zone. It's something that I'm doing a lot more now and getting into this kind of health and biohacking and that sort of thing. I mentioned Sanctum before on another podcast and it's it's like wearing these headphones, listening to this music, getting guided meditation and kind of throwing your arms around and looking at it from the outside in. It's it doesn't look like something you want to be inside of and then you get inside. It's like the laughing, laughing medicine that you say, you know, when you see videos of that, you just see people standing in a room laughing at each other and you think that is my worst nightmare. But until you try these things, you know, and you figure out the profound effect it has on your health and your well-being, it's it's, you know, so yeah, I like that message is to throw yourself into those things.

Jade Horton 01:16:00 
Yeah you should because that's how you grow. Exactly. You can't just, well some people might feel comfortable just staying in their little lane but there's just so much out there that you can do to help.

Andy Smith 01:16:12 
Yeah, sure. So, where can people find you, Jade? If somebody wants, you know, obviously if someone's going through a situation like this, or if they just want to talk to you, if they want to talk about Reiki, where's the best place to start? So, social media.

Jade Horton 01:16:24 
I'm on Instagram, TikTok, and also Facebook, and on all of those, there's my email address as well, and my telephone number. I haven't set up a website yet because I don't feel I need to do that at the moment, because I get referrals through social media at the moment. But once I start to branch out with bigger things, that's when I will set up one. But my business is called Merkabah Holistics.

Andy Smith 01:16:53 
That's your Instagram as well, isn't it? It is, yeah. I think that's when you contacted us. Yeah, so we'll leave a link to that as well at the bottom of this podcast so people can click on it and find you. Yeah, excellent. OK, so, I mean, thank you so much for your time today and for sharing this experience with us and doing it in such bold, expressive, you know, and so strong, you know, I don't think it's something that a lot of people would be able to do. Yeah. So, you know, thank you so much. And I'm sure so many people are going to hear this and also, you know, be in awe of what you're doing. So thank you for that. And I know you're up for a couple of awards soon. So I am. Yes. Good luck for those and hope something comes through. Yeah, lovely.

Jade Horton 01:17:32 
Thank you.